Monday, April 6, 2009

On Missing Skills:

I’ll find out later today how my computer ‘Rupert’ is. What I do know about his condition is that it is not a virus, but probably a conflict of software programs. They will call me later today.

I am having fun revisiting some of my old games on my gamecube. I did find that I’m not used to using my thumbs as much since I moved onto games for my PC. Bilbo Baggins (The Hobbit), Link (Zelda - Wind, 4 Swords, & Twilight), and Omar (Picmin) have been keeping me company and on my exercise bike and out of the refrigerator.

I have discovered I have a lack of quality self soothing skills. I eat to feel better. This not good. I can’t ignore it any longer, although I am trying to learn to work around it. If I want to loose this excess weight I’ll have to find a better way to deal with daily bumps in the road.

I have to find something else that does not cost money, is not food, or craft project oriented to sooth myself. I collected some bad habits after my son died. I slipped into using outside things to substitute for dealing with my troubles.

This led to an escapist attitude. Eat it away, ignore it by doing something else, or buy something to make me feel better at the moment. All are okay to do sometimes, but not to use as a rule.

My first reaction after I stopped using my bad habits was to want to curl in a ball and suck on my thumb. Primitive and infantile, but telling. I went right back to the beginning looking for comfort to the negative things in life.

Somewhere in my life I started to take the easy way out. And now I have to find the right way to deal with things again.

My question: How do you self sooth when you can’t eat, buy, or pretend it away?

Right now I’m alternating from dealing with any one smaller trouble at the moment and escaping into video game land. This works for my weight loss but not for things like my frustration at my computer troubles. Any suggestions? My thumbs are getting tired.

1 comment:

Rebecca Nazar said...

I read or listen to music with a great cup of coffee.

I love yoga. Have you tried? It's soothing, you don't need any gear but a mat which is pretty cheap. There're lots of great DVDs or local classes around. I like to practice alone, focusing on stretching out my tension.

Kayaking is brilliant, but, obviously, it requires quite a bit more gear and water access.

Hang in there; you'll be gardening soon:-) That will keep you occupied.