Sunday, October 19, 2014

10 things you didn’t know about me.

I. One of my grandfather’s jobs was being on a roller derby team.
2. I was once a backup singer in my mother’s country western band.
3. The 3rd finger on my right hand was almost completely cut off but was successfully reattached.
4. I was a tenor in glee club but pinch hit as a soprano.  Because I was the only one in the group that could reach high ‘C’ and beyond.
5. I have 5 dogs buried in our pet cemetery.
6. I am the oldest of a 6 kid family.
7. I’ve had surgery 7 times in my life.  None cosmetic.
8. I had 8 boyfriends between my first and second marriages.
9. I was in the Girl Scouts for 9 years.
10. Our pet cemetery has 10 pets in all buried there.

Friday, October 17, 2014

I did have a plan…

Mountain Man, (Otherwise known as my husband.) went away for a week and a half with some of his friends to a conference.  This was a good thing for me.

I had lots of plans for crafts, and autumn cleaning, tea parties, day trips to places he doesn’t like to go like costume and oddity shops and such things.  And blogging, blogging, blogging.

This of course did not happen.  Because I had a plan.

What you need to know is that if I make plans, the universe laughs and spits in my face.

1. So my beloved, best pal of mine, dog got all mental and suddenly was scared of me.  He wouldn’t listen and ran from my presents.  Trembled and collapsed when I spoke to him.  Wouldn’t even eat if I was in the room.  Very strange as I did nothing to or around him for this to happen.

I had to take much time reprogram him to trust me again.

2. My heart started to act up due to a stomach thing that messed my electrolytes.

No driving for a few days.

3. I opened my mail to find a letter from one of my health care services telling me that they were hacked and my info was stolen.

No end of time in finding out if this was in fact true and getting ID protection.

4. The radiator in the car died.

Still further no driving, or shopping, or getting out in the real world.

Mountain Man is home now happy and relaxed from his get away.

I have a cold in my head.  The dog is fat and happy from being over fed treats.  And I still need my vacation.

But I'm back to my regular real life.  I’m canning vegetables from the garden, getting to the autumn cleaning around Mountain Mans activities, exercising the dog, and blowing my red sore nose.  Cough! Wheeze!

Next time he goes away I’m not making any plans.  And who knows I just might enjoy the heck out of it.  Its happened before.

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Happy Anniversary

Well we made it.  Woot!  Woot!  

I have been married to Mountain Man for 25 years.

This was not always a given.  My breast cancer and a few heart attacks could have gotten in the way and we are both getting older.

This was a second marriage for both of us.  It fits us.  We would not have been a fit for a first together.  We needed to live, learn, grow and change to make this fit.

And who else would put up with us but each other?  Ha, ha!

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring.  But I do know that this was a landmark in my life hard won and much appreciated.

Here’s to Us!

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Ignore the Sparkly and Make Some Progress

So, I have discovered that I am ADD. (Attention Deficit Disorder)

Not news to others in my life apparently, but news to me.

This does explain a lot.

My extreme need for new input.  Why I get bored to distraction so easily.  And why I can’t get my act together unless challenged by time constraints.  Just to name a few.

Knowing that my personal compass is broken made me feel a bit adrift.  Until I realized that its always been that way and I just wasn’t aware of it before.  And that I’ve made it this far the hard way.

Now that I have direction again the work begins.  I’m working on new ways to organize, cope, and manage my life.

I’ve also found that I did pretty good at managing this ADD already.

My card system for getting things done around here is one of the biggest.  (Sorry long time readers but here it goes again.)

I have a 3x5 card with every conceivable job that I do around here.  And I do mean every.  Light bulbs to closet corners.  Cobwebs to toilets.  Windows to refilling the condiments containers.

Some job descriptions are general, others much more specific.

All marked with day of the week and time.  (Not time as in 2:37 PM but how long before I need to do it again.)

They live in a large file box.  Full of tab cards to keep them in order with days of the week, weeks of the month, months of the seasons, seasons of the year.

The cards are color coded to help me even further.
White - Daily.  Yellow - Weekly/Biweekly.  Green - Monthly/Bimonthly.  Pink - Seasonally/Yearly.

Daily I pull out my cards for the day.  A rainbow of jobs to accomplish.  Once done the cards are recycled back into the file box year at their needed intervals.

This works great on a lot of levels.  It shows me that when big jobs are broken down they are easier to cope with.  I can go with the flow of the day and still get things done when an outing, phone call, or unexpected company interrupts my chores.  When I’m easily distracted I can come back to jobs and not forget and leave them half done forever.  On sick or busy days I can distribute jobs back into the next week easing the overload I once felt when I was knocked off my routine.

I’m still not a great house cleaner and never will be.  Mostly because its just not that important to me to live in a dust free environment.  (I still think cobwebs are cool.)  But I don’t lose things (Mostly time) nearly as often in the mess and I‘m less likely to trip on the latest half done project.

Do you have any more tips I could use?

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Look a Contest...

So Goth Gardening is having a Halloween contest and I've desided to enter with a new story on my Thrill or Shiver story blog come Halloween day.  Rules and all that.

I hope the links work.  The picture should get you to her blog.  I haven't done this kind of thing for some time and a lot has changed here.  If not click here.

She has a great blog with lots of pictures and fun stuff going on.  Go check it out.  

I'll be posting more often now that summer is over.

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Jury Duty, Control and Knitting

One of the things I like about being an elder Goth is the fact that I don’t feel that I have to act my age all the time.

True, there are the occasions that just scream out to all and sundry… Be a Grownup!  Act Adult!  Don’t Mess Around!

Of course this is a challenge to anyone like me.

I can be the sensible grown up.  Acting my age with grace and decorum.

But ‘Tell’ me that I must do so and bells and whistles go off in my head and trouble is sure to follow.

I get all silly and stupid.  I fidget and make noise.  I drop things and bump into things.

None of these things I do on purpose.  In fact I’m trying hard to control myself.  But this rebellious streak just comes charging to the surface.  And try as I might I just can’t pull this demon all the way back into the box.

And this was the case this week.  I was called to Jury Duty.  The Summon arrived in the mail weeks before and I arrived on time with my best grown up face on.  I sat and listened to the instructions, I quietly knit as I waited my turn to be called.  People around me started to chat with their neighbors about things of no importance.  (There was a lot of waiting to get through.)

When I was called to my group I sat with hands folded in my lap and didn’t fidget.  Even thou it was late in the day and many others had reached their limit.  I didn’t make the final cut so was asked to come back the next day for the other trials yet to be called for.

On the second day people were much friendlier, talk was louder and more jovial.  But there was also the feeling of ‘lets get this thing going so we can get back to our own lives again.’

Someone in a near group was trying to hush said group for an announcement that was trying to be given to the room.  And I heard it…

“Time to settle down and act like adults again.”

It hit me like a shot.  I started to giggle.  For no reason I could comprehend.  While I tried to stifle myself my knitting tumbled to the floor.  While I tried to collect my knitting I bumped the chair in front of me.  While I was quietly apologizing to the glaring face in front of me I started to hiccup.  And now I am the center of attention of the room as I’m asked to get my act together so the rest of the room can hear the message and commence with the day.

It went down hill from there.  I spilled my juice from my boxed lunch.  I accidentally flicked one of my knitting needles out of my knitting and into the next row.  (Not the thing to do by the way, when officers with guns are trained to watch for mayhem and stop it before harm can come to anyone under their care.)

My disruptiveness got other troublemakers into the mood.  Small disruptions erupted around the room after that.  I couldn’t wait to get this over with and go home.

Thankfully I didn’t get called to sit at a trial.  But being the start of all the unpleasantries of the day I had to stay after and be corrected.  For the next time I’m called on to serve.

At this point I’m just glad that I have three years before that can happen again.  And three years to practice being a grown up after hearing a reprimand.  Or at least discover why this happens to me so I can try to fix it.

But I don't think that they will be allowing knitting needle into the court house any longer.  A sad mark upon the world.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Meditate, Its Not Too Late.

Okay, so I’m seeing a therapist, and I’m getting some more coping skills in place, and the plants are still in orbit, and I’m into guided meditation now.

First let me say that being overwhelmed is not a good place to be.  It gets in the way of the things you want and need to do.

Second, stuff is still stuff and mostly it can wait stuffed away.  But you can’t stuff it away forever.

Third, life can be tough at times so put in a good supply of big girl (or boy, as the case may be.) panties and practice wearing them proudly.

Fourth, tomorrow will be another day.  And don’t sweat the small stuff.  Time heals.  Infinite Improbability Drive in place and working properly.  I will survive.

In therapy I’ve found out that I don’t like looking at my life too closely most of the time.  I just like getting down and living, enjoying, doing.  If I look too hard at my life it doesn’t look like what the TV, my parents, and teachers told me it would be like.  And this makes me a bit uncomfortable.

As a Goth this is a good/bad thing.  I like being different, but it doesn’t give me as many bridges into friendships.  Apparently Goths still scare vanilla people.  This includes happy Goths who play the Ukulele, and knit doll sweaters, and have broken family relationships not of their own making.

So I’m gonna’ put on my glittery bat wings today, meditate the heck out of most of the afternoon, and get this trolley back on track.  Stop spinning my wheels so to say.

Now if I only had a destination to point myself to.  And I still don’t know what was so wrong with the one I had.  It was working for me before.  (Note to self: Find Gothy guided meditations.)

Meditate, meditate, meditate.  I’m committed to this getting my life to a more controlled chaos again.  Maybe something will come to me then.  All will be made clear and brought into the light, as they say.

But for now, I think I’ll find a little shadowy corner to play in for a while.  Its more comfortable there anyway.