Sunday, November 2, 2008

On Deadly Allergies:

There is nothing quite like losing consciousness, while unable to talk and call for help, wondering if you will ever wake to this life again or if the meds have gotten into your system in time.

This happened to me yesterday while I was all alone. I had eaten something that I had eaten before with no troubles and wham! My throat started to close and quickly drinking some Benadryl liquid with my last gasping breaths, I lay myself face down on the floor before passing out. My head to the side incase I get sick while unconscious.

I woke a few minutes later with a head ache the size of a continent. The dogs were licking my face and hands in concern, or maybe just trying to get at the food flavor still on them, who knows?

My head, throat and chest still hurt, my eyes are still blood shot and I have an appointment to see my doctor. This is not the first time I have had a violent reaction to something but it was the worst time because I was alone when it happened.

Scary is a very small word for what I felt at that moment. So is panic, the need for mercy from my supreme being, the wish to see loved ones still alive again, the want to see loved ones already dead, desperateness, need for air, hot, cold, pain, blackness, light, alone, lost, space, begging for help from anywhere, dread, peace, nothingness, and more all at once.

For the moment I can’t stand anything around my neck. Even my hair is up in a bun to keep it from touching my throat and neck. I have been touched by the hand of death again, my skin feels scorched by it and I live to tell the tale. But there was nothing romantic about it. It was sheer terror and nothing I want to repeat.

So just to humor me, take anyone who says that they have allergies seriously. They are not just seeking attention. Have a list of every ingredient of every dish you bring to a pot luck or party in case someone asks. Save the labels of foods until they are gone so you can check them again. Have Benadryl Liquid on hand if you have people over to your place a lot. Some day those people might not be here to talk to you again and you don‘t want to be the one that helped them into the life after because you forgot that there was peanut oil or any other allergen in the dish you lovingly made and shared.

Yes, I know you can’t do anything about when a company changes an ingredient and doesn’t put it on the label like what just happened to me. But they often say things like ‘made on equipment that has been used for peanuts or other allergens.’ These I can avoid if I know about it.

Thanks, Lady Euphoria

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