On Being on Facebook:

I was on Facebook for about 24 hours over the weekend. I just couldn’t stand it. I literally hated every minute of it. I felt like my back was exposed and a target was on it. It made me break out in hives. I had to deactivate the account and run away to hide until I stopped shaking.

I am not a social peacock. Peacock, yes. Social, no. Even with my blog I talk with the people that come to play in a one on one manor. And I guard my personal information.

I don’t like crowds. I don’t play well in groups. I sit with my back to the wall so no one can sneak up on me. Organized sports and team play makes me nervous because I‘ve been hit by friendly fire before. I have an uncomfortable need to not conform and that in itself leaves me vulnerable.

And the other thing about Facebook was the knowing of things about others I didn’t ask about. I didn’t like being barraged with nonsense information. I didn’t need a third party to tell me about the latest score someone got on a game that I know nothing or care nothing about. I don’t really care what groups someone just joined unless the subject came up in conversation. I felt like someone was watching over my shoulder all the time just waiting to tell the world of Facebook friends my latest move.

Then, in thinking I was going to find the interests or activities of people I do personally know, when I went to see their pages, what I got was an eye full of what some other people are about out there and I was appalled at a small contingent. (Hey there liar, your pants are on fire.)

It is not that I don’t care, but more because I do care about others, that I don’t want to look into other peoples personal lives. I don’t want to know about how the baby played with his poop. Or how some out there are so clueless to their own inadequacies. I don’t need to watch someone else’s train wreck I can do nothing about. I can’t watch knowing some have too many kids already and are spending their time playing games on Facebook instead of taking care of those kids. It just hurts me too much to see it.

Yes, I do have my own issues because I have been betrayed badly by others in my life. Why on earth would I like to stick my neck out there and let someone thoughtlessly do it again. I am guarded for my own very good reasons. I screen my comments on my blog for those reasons also.

For me, you must gain and earn my true friendship as some of you here have already done. But on Facebook there were too many people free to out me to the ones I don’t want to find me and possibly hurt me again. I won’t be going back.