On What’s That I Smell? Or ‘Mother of Corpse Bride’:

Now, you don’t have to be Goth to find the smell of rotting corpse alluring. And, if you don’t get too close that it is over powering, there is something almost pleasant about it. Like skunk on the wind has a pleasant muskiness to it.

I went out to take down the dry laundry hanging on the clothes line this afternoon before I finished packing for the wedding. Some things were just washed and others were only being aired. The air was thick with heat, humidity and…. death.

Now, on any other occasion I wouldn’t mind smelling slightly of rot. And on the good side, this was reptile rot which has a sweeter and slightly spicy aroma to it. BUT, THIS IS MY DAUGHTERS WEDDING I’M GOING TO.

I had a mild panic attack and then being to pack the clothing because I don’t have another option at this time. I couldn’t pack wet clothing even if I knew it was going to sit in the odor of rot all day. My concern is that once the smell of corpse rot gets into something it is almost impossible to get it out again. Even Fabreeze doesn’t work on the smell of death rot. I don’t have the time to get another wedding weekends worth of clothing matching the wedding colors ready all over again and the rest of my clothing is gothic and not allowed at the wedding.

Mountain Man put the dead snapping turtle out in the woods so he could retrieve the shell when the rest of it had rotted away. He moved it farther from the house, but the ground itself still smells where it had been rotting for the last few days. My trouble is the wind changed direction shortly after I hung the laundry and the worst of the odor was waifting over my clothes line for most of the day.

So, if you come near the wedding of my Princess Daughter and her Prince Charming and you smell something kind of like death, it’s the mother of the bride. I’ll be the one with Ode D’ Corpse perfume. ‘Mother of Corpse Bride.’

Do you think I have time to pack my black lipstick after all? Any ideas would be helpful.